Stupid Car

[TINT]

summer 2003 - Oregon

(Summer 2003, Oregon) There was no media coverage on this one. I was a witness and rescuer. Around 7AM, I looked up from the machine I was running at work, and saw an older-model Nissan at the stop sign across the street. Its emergency flashers were on. A heavyset young woman emerged, opened the hood, and leaned in to manipulate something inside. Suddenly the car lurched forward, knocking her down.

I immediately ran for the door. By the time I started across the parking lot, the bumper of the car was up over her lower belly, and was slowly shoving her out into the four-lane boulevard! If she had been thinner, the car very probably would have rolled over her, making her a true Darwin nominee.

The situation reminded me of the Steven King story where the car starts trying to k!ll people. Unsuccessful at running her over on its own, the woman's car had begun pushing her into the boulevard's right lane, where other cars could finish the job.

After checking for traffic, I ran across the street to help. Very fortunately for her, the next vehicle to approach on her side was a school bus and the driver was quick-witted enough to turn on the flashing red lights, stopping traffic on that side.

As I sprinted to the driver's door, I remember feeling a flash of irritation as the woman gasped to me, "Put it in reverse." Did she think I was going to try to lift it off her? I hopped in and carefully reversed the car. She stood up, brushed herself off, and said, "Stupid car. The transmission linkage is always sticking."

Dumbfounded, all I could think of to say was, "Maybe you should set the parking brake next time." I consciously didn't say, "The car is stupid?"